close, close, close

bloodshed outdoors
worship indoors
i should listen to
either of the two

you close the door
either of the bloodshed and worship

please worship bloodshed
close bloodshed worship
close bloodshed please
please worship close

close the heart
that hurts
close the eyes
that blind
close the ears
that hear
close the nose
that smells
close the tongue
that tinges

close i, myself and me
close me, myself, i
close myself, i and me
close i and me, myself


Anonymous said...

My favourite of yours I have read. Although I would personally ditch the little 'i' you seem to have going all the way 'i should listen' = 'I should listen'Does that not make your Poem stand taller/prouder?
Sometimes the repetition in Poetry works, sometimes it doesn't. This does.Well done, you. Well written.

Mandip said...

excellent!!!!I totally agree with SARAHA.BUT I doubt whether it will ring in the ears of the hardcore people.I think u got my point........

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