Adieu Suborna

I have done many errors in my life and many more to others’. Hundred errors have rectified my soul and thousand wrongs have sanctified my heart.

In the recent past, a little over a solar month, I couldn’t even find a lame chance to bid adieu to Suborna, my student, who committed suicide for no cause known to me as yet. I taught her together with her brother for four long years.

I am becoming a stupid goliath of knowledge, as hard and rich as basalt, but whoever or whatever comes to my knowledge remains fossilized for ever. I always knew she would love to be unlike others. However, her tremendous aspiration for terminating her life was always hidden from eyes.

Before her death, I wrote an error on my fate. I talked many things about death, with her brother, one fine evening, and read out aloud a beautiful story about death.

Misleading conception or misconception can only give knowledge. Sitting in the heap of darkness, when my motherboard is still in coma and I’m keeping my blogging mania alive through another’s computer, I feel a pull to write about Suborna, who had done errors and to whom I had left many more.

And one of the errors was... I forgot to bid her goodbye.

8 comments:

Beyond Horizon said...

My words wud lack d intense emotions but want 2 say u did say good bye bcoz she is alive in the memories...

Alcina said...

You couldn't have done anything..and there lies no fault of yours..god has his own ways of calling the ones he wants..
Her job was finished lucky enough to have done the thing she was sent to do in her lifetime..and she has achieved it..I wouldn't be sad for her..but pray for her soul to rise up in purity and be preserved as pristine has it has risen up from suborna..

Dibakar Sarkar said...

Beyond Horizon, Mr Lonely and Alcina - your comments deserve my heart-felt love nurtured long through sorrows...

Hopelessly Flawed said...

@"Hundred errors have rectified my soul and thousand wrongs have sanctified my heart."
...brilliant

your blog is a piece of art.

you have courage and you have a beautiful soul...i am sure you will find your peace.

Sh@s said...

May her soul rest in peace. It was not that you couldn't say goodbye to her. The fact is that she never gave anybody a chance to say goodbye to her. I don't think that sharing views on death with her egged her to take such a tragic step. So, don't feel guilty. When one has to go, one goes, the mode of transport might be different for each of us. For her it was an unnatural and unexplained one. Peace be with you.

hope and love said...

thats too sad.. may god give strength to her family and friends

Maria said...

sad... your words are intensely moving. it wasn't your fault though.. and surely your student thought of you as one of the most important people in her life yet what is meant to happen is bound to happen.

btw thanks for following my blog. i like your blog, your words and the truthful emotions you convey here. will be back for more. :)

Suparna Mondal said...

it's beautiful...it's touched my heart..reminding me whom I forgot to bid ...

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